


Operation SESSION

by jaymymy



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Birds, Derse, Other, Prospit, SBURB
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-09
Updated: 2015-06-15
Packaged: 2018-04-03 16:12:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4107060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaymymy/pseuds/jaymymy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A fan-made story based on a fan-sburb game using Pesterchum and the Overseer Project, for personal logging of our explorations. Anyone welcome to read this on-going mess of a game with a smidgen of comedy and some story telling littered around interactive logs between 4 Real Life People doing things in Real Life based on Fictional Stuff. </p><p>Hope you don't think it's too crappy :* mwuah</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. BEGIN SESSION

It’s a great day. The sun is shining, you’re in your wonderful room of plants, everything is bright and happy. What’s your name?

==>WREN YARROW 

Your name is WREN YARROW. You are SEVENTEEN YEARS OLD. You have a dabbled passion in HERBOLOGY and like to DRAW ART, however you rank your skills in the field as MEDIOCRE. You are noticeably known for being VERY INDECISIVE AND CONFUSED, much to the disgruntlement of anybody who knows you. Your friends have already learned to cope though. You type in lowercase and love the use of exclamation marks in odd numbers!!! You very rarely swear as opposed to some others.  
Speaking of others…

==> Wren: Speak to others.

\-- floralCatastrophe [FC] began pestering haplessSharpshooter [HS] --  
FC: ✿ okay  
FC: ✿ this is a bit simpler :3  
FC: ✿ hehehe  
FC: ✿ cmon buddy  
FC: ✿ help me out here  
HS: With what?  
FC: ✿ hmmm  
FC: ✿ a not sucky name hehe  
HS: Maybe try crows.  
FC: ✿ Corvidae?  
HS: Yeah  
FC: ✿ hmm  
FC: ✿ Corvidae Anthropophagus?  
HS: Yeah  
FC: ✿ cannibal crows i guess  
FC: ✿ or Corvus Anthropophagus  
FC: ✿ CannibalCorvidae  
FC: ✿ ???  
HS: Ohhhh that sounds good  
FC: ✿ the latter?  
HS: Yeah  
HS: Wait no  
HS: The Corvus one  
FC: ✿ ok!  
FC: ✿ and the password can be cawcaw  
FC: ✿ hhahaha  
FC: ✿ perfect!  
FC: ✿ i have a small one as well  
FC: ✿ wanna see???  
FC: ✿ mleeeeeeh !!!!!!!!!!  
FC: ✿ oh well  
FC: ✿ here  
FC: ✿ i have the server set up  
FC: ✿ go ahead and join  
HS: Nice  
FC: ✿ i'll get my friend into the game  
FC: ✿ they'll be my client  
FC: ✿ then you can join up and they'll connect to you  
FC: ✿ i have a memo up: #CannibalCorvidae  
HS: What's the session name?  
FC: ✿ CannibalCorvidae  
FC: ✿ password is cawcaw  
HS: Will you be my client?  
FC: ✿ hmmm  
FC: ✿ yes sure  
FC: ✿ sooo  
FC: ✿ me > roadkill > steel > you > me  
FC: ✿ yes?  
HS: Yeah  
FC: ✿ cool  
HS: What's your user?  
FC: ✿ mhm  
FC: ✿ wait till i join  
FC: ✿ i'll connect to roadkill  
FC: ✿ then we'll complete the link  
HS: Ok  
FC: ✿ come to the memo  
FC: ✿ ahaha ok  
\-- haplessSharpshooter [HS] ceased pestering floralCatastrophe [FC] –

So you have that all set up. That was one of your closest friends. She’s very ~*mysterious*~ and tends to keep things to herself. You’ve never known any reason for her secretive behaviour. But you suppose you can’t exactly complain. Now to sort out your other friends…

==> Wren: Speak to other person.

\-- floralCatastrophe [FC] began pestering roadkillCupcake [RC] --  
FC: ✿ :O  
RC: s0rry  
FC: ✿ its ok!  
RC: i started watching an0ther m0vie  
FC: ✿ but yeah we have a memo open (its OperationSESSION)  
RC: i've alm0st finished sewing up gh0ulia's leggings!  
RC: i wrecked the tights 00ps  
FC: ✿ omg  
RC: s0 imma absc0nd f0r a bit and get these leegi0s d0ne then i might j0in y0u  
RC: s0rry f0r abband0ning ye  
FC: ✿ okay well you have the memo name  
FC: ✿ we're gonna try and make a session name and join you up okay?  
RC: 0kay  
\-- floralCatastrophe [FC] ceased pestering roadkillCupcake [RC] –

That girl and her movies. Again, another mysterious friend who doesn’t talk much about herself with the exception of dolls. Or candles. She really loves candles.  
So you have your game set up and you’re so hyped to play it with all of your friends! There’s only one friend who seems to be missing, but they’re not available for now. You’re awfully busy making sure your friends get into the game in time. 

== Wren: Be your other friend.


	2. Be the other friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Music for this character: http://forestglade.tumblr.com/post/121329713444/a-theme-for-a-character-im-using-on-the-overseer

You are now the other friend.

You are now [REDACTED], aka Devastice, or Dev for short. If you gave your real name to anyone you'd have a problem, mostly because [REDACTED]. Your hobbies include going to the shooting range and taking care of the local ravens, as well as playing games like [REDACTED]. You don't give a lot of information to anyone, including your friends like [REDACTED 1], [REDACTED 2] and [REDACTED 3]. Yeah, that's all the friends you have. Of course there's that raven that likes to hang around your room when you open your window, Redacted. Yes, that's what you named it. Good job, you.

You’ve just finished having an interesting conversation with your friend regarding the name of a memo. That would be Wren, such an innocent go-lucky child who’s open about anything. If she knew any of what you knew…

Right now, you’re trying to balance multiple problems at once. You’re all the game and need to start building things up. Specifically, getting items to get you into the game properly. On top of that, you have some sleep-bound business to also attend to. The agents are getting rather rowdy, and you worry that your good friend is going to be the target. Something must be done about it.

You need to get to Prospit. Unfortunately both you and your friend, [REDACTED 2], are from Derse, and dear Wren hasn’t even woken up yet. This is going to prove a far more difficult task than you expected. But she won’t know any better. Maybe she could help you?

Hang on, somebody’s talking to you. It’s her.

==> Devastice: Reply.

\-- floralCatastrophe [FC] began pestering haplessSharpshooter [HS]--  
FC: ✿ ADDITION: i have given kiriga an alchemiter, 2 captchalogue cards (blank) and a CD for gristtorrent. im gonna need you to do the same for me too dev!  
FC: ✿ thank you !! <3  
FC: ✿ also i'll get kiriga to do the exact same for you once you get me these items  
FC: ✿ with that, we can share grist around to all of us for alchemy later in the game  
FC: ✿ i've set up kiriga and steel, i need you to set me up with these things, and then i'll show kiriga to get the stuff for you and then to steel  
FC: ✿ cruxtruder and first gate added to kiriga's home  
FC: ✿ dev?  
HS: Sorry I was busy  
FC: ✿ argh!  
FC: ✿ okay so  
FC: ✿ i have given kiriga a cruxstruder, an alchemiter, 1 house built up and 2 free captchalogue cards  
FC: ✿ i need you do the the same for me when you get the chance please!  
HS: Ok!  
FC: ✿ thank you!  
FC: ✿ i have some money and grist building up  
FC: ✿ we're only missing out on a handful of types of grist  
FC: ✿ like amethyst and diamond and such  
FC: ✿ but i'm getting what i can from lowly imps  
FC: ✿ some access. stuff from the shop is good enough though  
HS: No problem! And yeah  
FC: ✿ hehehe  
HS: The game is being a dick so I’ll deploy your things in a bit  
FC: ✿ dang  
FC: ✿ that's a shame  
FC: ✿ i've managed to climb the rung a bit though!  
\-- floralCatastrophe [FC] ceased pestering haplessSharpshooter [HS] -–

Well, you aren’t lying at least.

You take the time to have a look at the raven messing with your computer wires. What a pain. You kindly bap the bird away from the cables connecting you to your client, you can’t have yourself disconnecting at such a time as this. 

One of your acquaintances has managed to get you some captcha codes and for the last few minutes you’ve been randomly meshing codes together. Punch the card, get the dowel, carve the dowel, alchemize. Rinse and repeat. You keep doing this over and over again and get nothing. It’s either random junk or stuff that just disappears from right in front of your eyes. The game does not recognise such an existence of an item. Sadly, you can’t mix a plush with a Pokémon game. You feel a bit [REDACTED] about this. You really wanted a Wailord plush. 

Either way, you’re not getting anything that you need fast enough with all this random mashing of codes. It’s completely nonsensical! 

Oh well. You’re smart. You can figure something out. The plan has to be smart. It has to be BIG. It has to be perfect. And most of all, it has to remain [Classified].

Whilst you think of your plan, you get another alert from your aquaintance. This better be worth your time.


	3. Please stop the [REDACTED]

You’ve been extremely busy for the past day, fighting and setting up this game. You’re going to need your devices set up soon to get your own jobs done, like building up your weapons.

You earlier grabbed 2 knives from your kitchen downstairs whilst trying to avoid contact with your mother. Can’t have her spotting you grabbing such dangerous items. You can’t use the excuse of needing them to take care of your plants because you have 2 in your possession, not just one! Not even your venus fly trap is large enough for such a thing.

Whilst sneaking away from your mother, you make a quick crash to your garage. You’re going to need something better to fight with. Combing should work right? 

Out of the corner of your eye you see an old chainsaw. You think it still works. You can’t ever remember seeing your mother using it for any gardening activities. In fact, she uses a hedge strimmer for your garden. Why would she ever even need a chainsaw? But it appears useful, so you captchalogue it anyway.

==>Wren: Captchalogue old chainsaw.

You take the chainsaw and captchalogue it into your sylladex, the one where you have to recite things verbally in latin to get what you need from it. Strenuous, but educational! 

Now that you have the chainsaw, you can sneak back upstairs and get some work done, finally! You make sure to be wary of the ivy growing over the banister in your stairwell and make it back safe and sound without a nagging mother getting onto your case for stealing a pair of knives. Such teen rebellion! You can feel your heart pattering away like mad at the prospect of it all! You wonder if your friend can help you make an even better weapon than you have now. That should show the pesky imps crowding your home!

==>Wren: Pester Devastice.

\-- floralCatastrophe [FC] began pestering haplessSharpshooter [HS]--  
FC: ✿ if you could torrent me some grist ill be so grateful  
HS: Wired  
FC: ✿ thanks!  
HS: Np  
FC: ✿ can i get some captcha cards too please???  
FC: ✿ thank you <3  
FC: ✿ i got the dual chainknives!  
FC: ✿ thank you!  
HS: Sure  
FC: ✿ just a couple cards because the others are code filled so  
HS: Oh  
HS: You have  
HS: 10  
HS: Youre welcome  
FC: ✿ thanks!  
HS: No big deal  
FC: ✿ nice  
FC: ✿ i just went up like just under 100 strife power  
FC: ✿ dang  
FC: ✿ i can kill off x7 imps in 2 moves  
FC: ✿ sweeet!  
FC: ✿ wish there was a better way to regain health  
FC: ✿ sigh  
HS: 30000 frosting  
HS: The other two types I have and I can work on getting them myself  
FC: ✿ hmmm  
FC: ✿ i happen to have 30,000 frosting  
HS: Did you cheat  
FC: ✿ nope  
HS: How did you get it that fast  
FC: ✿ frosting is the easiest enemy type i have so i worked up my echeladder  
HS: Ahhhh  
FC: ✿ fought some ogres that drop over 5000 each time  
FC: ✿ easy  
FC: ✿ i'll wire it over  
HS: My ogres only drop like a thousand shale  
FC: ✿ what rank is your shale?  
HS: 2  
FC: ✿ yeaa  
FC: ✿ if youe fighting jet you're just gonna have to live with it till you're strong enough to even battle shale ogres  
FC: ✿ ive fought so much  
FC: ✿ echeladder at 204 with 252 strife power  
FC: ✿ :P  
HS: Jet is 4 or 5  
FC: ✿ really?? huh  
HS: Yeah I only fought imps to get the 50 jet  
FC: ✿ haha  
FC: ✿ wired  
HS: Thanks  
FC: ✿ seriously though!  
FC: ✿ so much stuff!  
FC: ✿ im riiiiich!  
FC: ✿ any other gristtypes you need??? :O  
HS: Not atm!  
FC: ✿ mk!  
FC: ✿ i cant strife anymore for now  
FC: ✿ got some nice grist tho  
FC: ✿ x2 ogres and stuff  
HS: Do you mind if I build up your house  
FC: ✿ hmm  
FC: ✿ go ahead i suppose!!!  
FC: ✿ i have plenty of grist  
HS: Ok!  
FC: ✿ honestly what are both of you even up to?  
FC: ✿ i seem to be working hardest here to get to my planet  
HS: *Shrugs*  
FC: ✿ i haven't even woken up yet  
HS: Haha  
FC: ✿ seriously!  
HS: Yeah I know  
HS: You're still tired it sounds like  
FC: ✿ no i mean  
FC: ✿ in game  
FC: ✿ in the game  
FC: ✿ i have not  
FC: ✿ i  
HS: I know  
FC: ✿ hmmm!!!  
HS: It was a joke  
FC: ✿ it was so slow it doesnt even count!!!  
FC: ✿ who takes 6 minutes to make a joke???  
HS: Pfffff  
HS: Okay well make sure no one puts peanutes in your mouth to assassinate you FC: ✿ dev  
HS: Yeah  
FC: ✿ im not allergic to anything  
FC: ✿ you and your "pollen" allergy  
HS: That doesn't mean you can't choke on them  
FC: ✿ i dont even like peanuts!  
HS: Well if you're asleep you can't really stop them can you  
FC: ✿ are you trying to tell me something  
FC: ✿ are your dersite friends plotting  
HS: I don't know  
HS: I don't have friends on Derse other than roadkill  
HS: I haven't even explored yet  
FC: ✿ we're a 4 player session  
FC: ✿ of course you don't  
FC: ✿ i highly doubt i'll be put onto derse either  
FC: ✿ if i do then i  
FC: ✿ well  
FC: ✿ i'd probably attempt to rebel asap!  
HS: Okay have fun with the extremely bright color pallete they have over there  
FC: ✿ oh come on  
FC: ✿ you know i love bright colours!  
FC: ✿ despite the fact they betray my eyes so  
FC: ✿ i do still love them  
FC: ✿ my bright flowers, the sun, pastels!  
HS: If I wore bright colors I'd be dead by now  
FC: ✿ you're a dersite i'm not surprised  
FC: ✿ wonder what it's like on prospit though...  
HS: Probably fluffy and bright  
FC: ✿ this is gonna be dodgy to ask so please dont tell kiri i asked but  
HS: Okay  
FC: ✿ (is it true that dersites actually go after prospitians???)  
FC: ✿ please tell me it isnt!  
FC: ✿ i don't want to wake up to a lost limb, if i ever do wake  
HS: Well I don't know about others but [redacted]  
FC: ✿ ugh!  
FC: ✿ you and your redacted information!!!  
HS: Yeah  
FC: ✿ youre my friend theres no need for such redaction!  
FC: ✿ i dont even know your real name  
FC: ✿ youre impossible sometimes  
HS: I also have information that's classified  
HS: Like my name  
HS: Which is both  
FC: ✿ bluh!!!  
HS: *Shrugs*  
FC: ✿ cmon!  
FC: ✿ theres gotta be something you can tell me about yourself that isnt redacted  
FC: ✿ and isnt about birds!  
HS: Well I was about to say birds but okay  
HS: I play games  
FC: ✿ what kind?  
FC: ✿ dont say sburb  
HS: [Redacted]  
FC: ✿ come on!  
FC: ✿ thats not even close to fair  
FC: ✿ why is that even redacted?  
FC: ✿ its not even dangerous information!  
FC: ✿ youre completely misusing the word and use of redaction!  
HS: Yeah I know  
HS: But the less you know the better  
FC: ✿ im not at harm for knowing what games you play  
HS: I haven't set foot on Derse and I doubt any of them like me  
HS: Okay I'll tell you one  
FC: ✿ youre still awake though  
HS: Scrabble  
FC: ✿ scrabble  
HS: Yeah that doesn't mean I've explored  
HS: Yes  
FC: ✿ just scrabble  
FC: ✿ like  
FC: ✿ on a board  
FC: ✿ a ds  
FC: ✿ on pc  
HS: Board  
FC: ✿ youre so oldschool  
HS: Sure lets go with that  
FC: ✿ loser  
FC: ✿ :P  
HS: Nah  
FC: ✿ you so are too a loser  
FC: ✿ loser loser loser loser loser!!!  
FC: ✿ see!  
FC: ✿ a 5 a 3 and a 1!!!  
FC: ✿ lucky it wasnt 7 or 9 :P  
HS: I may be a loser  
FC: ✿ you are  
HS: But at least birds can talk back  
HS: Unlike plants  
FC: ✿ plants do talk!!!  
FC: ✿ how dare you  
HS: I've never heard a plant talk  
FC: ✿ they do talk just very very quietly and pleasantly  
FC: ✿ then you dont listen hard enough!  
HS: I don't think I can take a minute for anything that's very pleasent  
FC: ✿ how do you take time for yourself, then?  
FC: ✿ :P  
HS: All my time is to myself but what I do with it is my business  
FC: ✿ you make it sounds so secretive it makes me wonder what youre actually hiding  
FC: ✿ hmmmmm  
FC: ✿ your business...  
FC: ✿ hahahahaha!  
FC: ✿ :P  
HS: We may never know  
HS: At least you won't  
HS: Because it's not your business  
HS: It's mine  
FC: ✿ i can only make short suspections of what you do  
FC: ✿ some of them are absolutely hilarious speculations  
FC: ✿ some are a tad more disturbing  
FC: ✿ either way, hilarious nontheless  
HS: It's probably on the more disturbing side of things  
HS: More Derse-like things  
FC: ✿ >:O  
FC: ✿ so you...  
FC: ✿ assassinate people?  
HS: Again who knows  
HS: Maybe  
HS: Maybe not  
HS: Only my birds know  
HS: Again this is my business  
FC: ✿ your poor birds  
HS: And while I am the ceo the birds are second in command  
HS: They can sort out their own pecking order  
FC: ✿ that was a terrible pun  
FC: ✿ i almost hate you for it :P  
HS: That wasn't supposed to be a pun actually  
HS: A pecking order is an actual thing  
FC: ✿ im aware  
FC: ✿ thank you for assuming my intelligence is less than it is  
HS: You're welcome  
FC: ✿ what?  
HS: Or should I say  
HS: Your welcome  
FC: ✿ youre horrible  
FC: ✿ a suitable dersite  
HS: Yes  
HS: Oh off the subject  
HS: Do you by any chance  
HS: Have any black spray pain  
FC: ✿ um  
HS: You could get to Prospit  
HS: And I could get to  
HS: For no particular reason  
FC: ✿ are you meaning to tell me  
FC: ✿ you need black spray paint  
FC: ✿ for a, oh and let me guess  
FC: ✿ [redacted] reason  
HS: Yes  
FC: ✿ how will that get me to prospit?????????  
HS: I don't know but I want to borrow it  
HS: For a day or so  
FC: ✿ well  
FC: ✿ dev  
FC: ✿ i dont mean to sound rude or object to friendly favours but  
FC: ✿ i would much prefer some context to your need for such an  
FC: ✿ obscure thing  
HS: The less you know the better  
HS: But if it shines any light on anything  
HS: I don't like the yellow colors  
HS: Or any bright colors really  
FC: ✿ dev you need to stop hiding stuff from me  
FC: ✿ also  
FC: ✿ you arent a prospitian  
FC: ✿ you neednt worry about the brightness  
HS: I'll get there somehow  
FC: ✿ but youre a dersite!  
HS: Yeah  
FC: ✿ youre not supposed to be on prospit are you?  
FC: ✿ wouldnt that cause a panic?  
HS: No  
HS: Do you think that would stop me  
FC: ✿ dev this is risky FC: ✿ i dont like this FC: ✿ or trust this FC: ✿ this thing FC: ✿ this idea FC: ✿ theres no need for such a thing to be done! HS: Okay well just throw the spray paint out the window and I'll find it HS: You'll have no ties to whatever happens HS: That may or may not HS: Be tracable back to me FC: ✿ dev FC: ✿ im not even awake on prospit HS: Okay well FC: ✿ i thought you said derse was trillions of times away from skaia than prospit was??? HS: Again I'll find a way HS: Maybe some portal FC: ✿ ... FC: ✿ no HS: I don't know yet FC: ✿ im not doing it HS: Okay well I might just go find some sludge or something FC: ✿ sludge??? HS: Yes FC: ✿ ????? FC: ✿ sludge? HS: Yeah FC: ✿ what sludge? FC: ✿ what for? FC: ✿ dev... FC: ✿ is this about prospit and me? HS: [Classified] FC: ✿ no! FC: ✿ shut up! FC: ✿ stop the classified! HS: It has nothing to do with you FC: ✿ i deserve to know if it has anything to do with prospit! HS: Trust me the less you know about me in general and what I do the better FC: ✿ you know i hate swearing but FC: ✿ dev FC: ✿ thats bullshit!!!!! HS: Yeah it is FC: ✿ you can tell me FC: ✿ you can! HS: I'd really rather not HS: Ever since I woke up I've been in a bit of a bind here without even leaving my room HS: And I'm not gonna get you wrapped up in it either FC: ✿ ugh FC: ✿ if i dont hear another word from you FC: ✿ ill get something from kiriga HS: If you don't hear another word from me I'm probably dead FC: ✿ what!!!! FC: ✿ dev tell me whats happening!!!!! HS: Nothing unusual for me HS: I can handle myself HS: But like I said HS: The less you know the better FC: ✿ dev please FC: ✿ youre my friend FC: ✿ if youre going to die, dreamself or not, please tell me! HS: Yeah HS: That's why I keep things secret HS: If I know I'm going to die I'll tell you HS: But the thing is I won't know before hand \-- haplessSharpshooter [HS] ceased pestering floralCatastrophe [FC] -- You’re fed up so much right now with your friends!!! They’re such a bother to keep a track of. You’re going to need to speak to someone else on your team. A certain troll.


	4. ENTER: Trolls

Your name is KIRIGA ISIMON, you have ORCHID blood and type in a sp00ky way. You have a passion for MUSIC, particularly ROCK, INDIE and POP MUSIC. Despite y0ur love for MUSIC you have no talent in this area except a popular TROLL RADIO SHOW which plays up and coming BANDS and MUSICIANS that is broadcasted right from your hive.

Most trolls that know you personally know you are not as confident as you are on your RA-DIO SHOW and are in fact quite TIMID AND QUIETLY SPOKEN. Your strife specibus is STRINGKIND. You use an ACOUSTIC GUITAR to smash in the heads of your enemies, for a SMALL TIMID troll you really can be quite BRUTAL.

==> Kiriga: Pick up your acoustic guitar.

You pick up your acoustic guitar and add it to your sylladex, and nearly risk tripping over some of the wires connected to your microphone and speakers in your hive. Your server player has been very polite in not breaking the belongings in your hive, much to your relief. The hell you would raise if she broke any of your shit.

There she is now.

==> Kiriga: Get pestered by friend.

\-- floralCatastrophe [FC] began pestering roadkillCupcake [RC] at 19:12 --  
RC: hell0!  
FC: ✿ hello there kiri!  
RC: y0u still have n0t aw0ken have y0u?  
FC: ✿ not yet :(  
FC: ✿ dev just dumped a ton of plants in my bathroom!  
RC: 0h  
FC: ✿ she really is a mystery  
RC: i am glad y0u d0n't fuck up my hive like that  
FC: ✿ shes been hiding more than usual though  
RC: 0h?  
FC: ✿ she asked for some paint  
FC: ✿ said something about prospit and derse?  
FC: ✿ she wont tell me  
FC: ✿ says its all classified  
RC: 0h..  
FC: ✿ do you have any clue what she's up to???  
RC: well all i can tell y0u ab0ut derse is they d0 enj0y mugging pe0ple  
RC: i have n0 clue ab0ut anything else  
RC: 0ther than i f0und c0ffee in my st0rage  
RC: i think she put it there  
FC: ✿ what on earth is she even doing  
RC: i have n0 clue  
RC: i d0 n0t understand y0u humans at all  
FC: ✿ hmmmmm  
FC: ✿ i do remember you being silent when i started making cute heart emojis!  
FC: ✿ i still find it hard to believe you even exist!  
FC: ✿ trolls? horns???  
FC: ✿ so new and exciting!!!  
RC: and y0u all have the same bl00d c0l0ur  
RC: but there's different skin t0nes instead?  
FC: ✿ mhm!  
RC: s0unds interesting  
FC: ✿ you get people of different shapes, sizes, appearances  
FC: ✿ textures in skin and hair  
FC: ✿ different tones of skin! pale or dark, olive  
FC: ✿ etc  
FC: ✿ thousands!  
RC: well we have the different bl00d c0l0urs and h0rns shapes and lusi  
RC: als0 there's land dwellers and sea dwellers  
FC: ✿ lusi?  
RC: lusi.. i guess it's like a parent kind 0f thing  
RC: 0r a guardian  
FC: ✿ huh  
FC: ✿ yeah i can understand that!  
FC: ✿ like an uncle or some kind of godparent?  
RC: i think?  
FC: ✿ :P  
RC: they ch00se y0u when y0u are a grub  
RC: kind 0f  
FC: ✿ really  
FC: ✿ so you have no parents then?  
FC: ✿ :O  
RC: kind 0f  
RC: well the lusi is my “parent” i supp0use but i d0nt kn0w  
RC: its really c0mplicated... y0u might n0t understand  
RC: and im n0t g00d at explaining s0rry  
FC: ✿ seems somewhat straightforward to me!  
RC: my internet is shitting up... i might dissc0nnect f0r a bit s0rry!!  
RC: i will talk as s00n as it's back 0n  
FC: ✿ okay!  
\-- roadkillCupcake [RC] changed their mood to OFFLINE --

She isn’t wrong. Devastice, one of the other humans, most certainly is a very sheltered person and even you don’t find it easy to keep track of her. You’ve been awake on Derse a long time now – awake longer than any of your other friends, not even your own troll friend.

If Devastice is going to mess with Derse, or even Prospit before you even get to hear about it from your friends, then you’re going to have to do some chatting. Whilst conversing human before you, you decide to pay the troublemaker a quick chat. See what you can pry from her.

\-- roadkillCupcake [RC] began tolling haplessSharpshooter [HS] --  
RC: hi  
HS: Yooo  
RC: heard from wren shits going down on our moon  
HS: Have you?  
HS: I’ve not been on it very long so I wouldn’t know  
RC: ive mainly just fucked ar0und 0n derse  
HS: I've been staying in the room  
RC: 0h well i made a friend  
RC: i think  
RC: we n0dded at each 0ther  
RC: and 0ther than that i just beat a shit t0n 0f muggers up  
HS: Ahhh  
HS: I haven't gone to sleep yet  
HS: So yeah I've just  
HS: Been in my room  
RC: 0h  
HS: I'm a fun person  
HS: As you can clearly see  
RC: y0u sh0uld sleep it's fun  
RC: b0th 0f y0u sh0uld  
RC: because i want t0 kn0w ab0ut pr0spit as well  
HS: Yeah I'm working on mashing codes though  
HS: I have the [redacted] I need already  
RC: 0h 0k  
HS: I'm pretty sure Prospit is all just bright colors  
HS: Yeah?  
RC: i think the dersians are up t0 s0me shit th0ugh  
RC: because they uh seem t0 be shifty i guess  
HS: Well I think that's their thing  
HS: Maybe  
HS: Who knows  
RC: yeah.. i supp0se  
HS: You suppose?  
RC: i dunn0  
HS: Well okay then I guess  
HS: I wouldn’t read too much into it though  
HS: Like I said I think their thing is to be shifty all the time  
RC: sweet i'm 0n the m00n 0f shifty muggers  
HS: Yep  
RC: so are y0u g0ing to tell me what y0ure up t0  
HS: Nope  
RC: i’ve been awake 0n derse l0nger than y0u have  
RC: s0rta is my business yknow  
HS: It’s for your and Wren’s own good  
RC: like hell it is  
HS: It is  
HS: And I’m not discussing it further  
HS: I have my plans and I’m running them  
RC: what plans?  
HS: [Classified]  
RC: 0h gdi  
\-- roadkillCupcake [RC] ceased tolling haplessSharpshooter [HS] --

Your internet wire has been very fuzzy recently. Damn connective outer city wiring. It’s dodgy as it is but when you check, you find… 

A bag of coffee. You don’t even like coffee. You’ve only heard of it as a highblood thing but it’s way too disgusting and bitter for your tastes. Looks like when it was given to you so recklessly from Devastice, it messed with the cords. You have no time for that now though. You already have other useful devices for communication, although it will hinder your use in game. Your client will not be happy.

You’re pretty tired. You think you’re going to sleep. Yeah, sleep sounds nice. Maybe your internet will have improved until then. Sleep sounds nice.

==> Kiriga: Go to sleep.

You go to sleep.


	5. Pester the sneaky mysterious girl

==> Wren: Pester Devastice.

[DENIED]

You cannot pester Devastice because it seems she has pestered you first. She's awfully eager. What bees are in her bonnet?

\-- haplessSharpshooter [HS] began pestering floralCatastrophe [FC] --  
HS: Yo  
FC: ✿ hello!  
HS: So Wren  
HS: Have you checked inside your house  
HS: Specifically your bathroom  
FC: ✿ um  
FC: ✿ no?  
FC: ✿ why do i need to be worried about my bathroom?  
HS: Just a feeling  
FC: ✿ oh  
FC: ✿ well i'll go see  
FC: ✿ what am i looking for?  
HS: You'll know  
FC: ✿ oh my  
FC: ✿ dev was this really necessary?  
HS: Maybe  
HS: Maybe now  
HS: Who knows  
HS: Only me  
FC: ✿ care to enlighten me on the over use of geraniums?  
HS: Nah  
FC: ✿ darn  
HS: If you need them you have them now  
FC: ✿ thank you either way dev  
FC: ✿ so  
FC: ✿ you have your paint and stuff  
FC: ✿ what are you going to do?  
HS: Yeah  
HS: Well now that I have the sendificator  
HS: I can send myself to Prospit  
HS: I need to figure out how to get back before I go though  
HS: So I don't get stuck there  
FC: ✿ why do you even need to get to prospit???  
HS: [Classified]  
FC: ✿ dev!!!!!!  
FC: ✿ okay so  
FC: ✿ classified information and beautiful geraniums aside  
FC: ✿ what are we going to do now?  
FC: ✿ strife our way to our planets or what?  
HS: I guess that's the plan?  
FC: ✿ probably my plan  
FC: ✿ youre going to be doing your own thing arent you  
HS: Probably  
FC: ✿ no way i can convince you to tell me anything huh  
HS: Nope  
FC: ✿ please dev  
FC: ✿ if something happens  
HS: If something happens I'll tell you more  
FC: ✿ dev  
FC: ✿ what if we cant get in contact though?  
HS: I'll find a way  
HS: As always  
FC: ✿ :(  
FC: ✿ i wish i could feel safer about this but you do make it quite difficult  
HS: Just believe me when I say I know how to take care of myself  
HS: Like I have been for a long time  
FC: ✿ theres more than just you dev!  
FC: ✿ you cant go making our whole session a mess just because you wont speak to us first!  
HS: It won't be a mess  
HS: It'll be organized and quick  
FC: ✿ it'll be a disaster i bet  
HS: No, it won't  
FC: ✿ >:O  
FC: ✿ devastice!  
HS: Yeah  
FC: ✿ come on!  
FC: ✿ im your friend and i have been a very long time  
FC: ✿ this is just getting to be very ridiculous  
HS: Once everything happens you'll be glad I haven't told you anything  
HS: You won't know anything about me and can't be connected to anything I do  
FC: ✿ youre going to do something bad arent you  
HS: Not necessarily bad  
FC: ✿ not necessarily?  
FC: ✿ thats a huge gap left for it being very bloody bad!  
FC: ✿ ugh now you have me swearing  
FC: ✿ >:(  
HS: Again don't worry about it  
HS: I have it under control  
HS: And I have a little backup  
HS: Aka all the birds that are living in my house  
HS: Because I never close my windows  
FC: ✿ that has to be unsanitary  
HS: Nah I keep it clean  
FC: ✿ theyre wild!  
HS: Yeah but they're nice  
HS: I have like three of them sitting on my bed right now  
FC: ✿ um hello birds carry parasites???  
HS: They're just hanging out  
FC: ✿ thats kinda gross!  
HS: No it's not  
HS: And don't worry I've checked them  
HS: None of them have any parasites  
HS: I also give them baths  
HS: They're all very clean  
FC: ✿ sigh  
HS: ;fsdjk  
HS: I sneezed and hit the keyboard  
FC: ✿ how do you even sneeze?  
FC: ✿ your house has no plants  
HS: The windows are open HS: Then the birds can't get in or out FC: ✿ close them HS: It’ll get crowded on both sides of the windows HS: One time Redacted clawed through a screen on one of the windows  
HS: And he let all the others in again  
HS: But it was summer so it was hot out  
FC: ✿ huh  
FC: ✿ totally normal  
HS: Well crows and ravens are really smart  
FC: ✿ im getting really sleepy from all this fighting  
HS: Maybe you should take a rest then  
FC: ✿ hmmm

You consider the option of maybe taking a nap. Surely you won’t miss out on much if all you do is sleep for a bit. You’ve been so preoccupied all day from fighting that it’s beginning to wear you down, but you can’t bring yourself to turn your back on your friend. You trust her and yet… She’s currently so untrusting.

FC: ✿ so  
FC: ✿ dev  
FC: ✿ youre ok if i nap right?  
FC: ✿ im beginning to lag behind by now  
FC: ✿ all this strifing  
HS: Yeah, go ahead  
FC: ✿ will you behave?  
FC: ✿ no need for more geraniums?  
FC: ✿ no shenanigans on derse?  
HS: No more plants  
HS: Can't promise nothing on Derse though  
FC: ✿ sigh  
FC: ✿ things better be okay when i wake back up  
HS: They will be  
FC: ✿ okay then  
FC: ✿ bbl! <3  
HS: Have a good rest

You honestly can’t say you feel reassured by any of her words, but you’ll have to just take what you can get. She won’t ease up any time soon for you. You can only hope for the best.

==> Wren: Have a quick nap.


	6. Chapter 6

Devastice: Begin plan.

Now that Wren has finally decided to sleep, you can put all your ideas into action. If all goes well, you should be able to get this job done relatively flappy. You mean snappy. Goddamnit.

You make your way to your sendificator. It’s a bit of a trip because your room has so many fucking birds in it that it’s difficult to move without disturbing the little things. Having your own sendificator was very useful and got a lot of geraniums clogged up in Wren’s bathroom. A useful distraction, you find.

You were lucky enough to find a transportalizer that led to Prospit. Of course, you send your trusty and faithful bird, Redacted, through the sendificator with a handy little CAMERA COLLAR, to track his movements. Need to make sure he gets to Wren. Also makes for good sightseeing, if everything weren’t so goddamn bright. Seriously, as soon as you look at your second monitor, you feel like your eyes are burning already, and you aren’t even there in person!

You watch as he begins to flap his way past countless of confused little white men in yellow garbs; Prospitians. Poor souls don’t have a damn clue what shit is about to go down in the next few minutes.

==> Be Redacted

You are now Devastice’s friendly bird, Redacted.

You have no idea why your host sent you to such a bright place, but it looks interesting enough. There’s a lot of new material around the area and you’re busy stuffing it all in your mouth. After a few minutes you look for a place to settle down and make a nest, quickly spotting the tallest building and flying up to the top. Inside you see a room and another human inside.

You’ve seen them recently on your host’s magic windows a lot, and you decide to start mak-ing the nest on their table before flying out the window again.

==> Redacted: Be Dev

You cannot currently be Dev due to the fact you have been slamming your face onto your desk for the past few minutes of watching your trusty Redacted dumpster-dive instead of doing anything useful.

==> Dev: Finally stop slamming your face on your desk.

All you can do for now however is sit and hope to God that he at least finds a pad you could use to get there. It’s simple enough to sendificate a goddamn bird. A whole person? Your-self? How would you get back to Derse? This is so stupid and you really should have looked more into your plan. This HAS to work. But you have to be wary. Now that Kiriga has heard from Wren about the vague plans you have for both planets, you have to be careful she doesn’t find you in the middle of all of this. That’s the last thing you could ever want.

==> Redacted: Be a Hero

You had landed on some sort of pad to take a rest, and the next thing you know everything is dark and you see your host walking down an alley away from you. You caw to get her atten-tion and fly over to her, and she quickly catches you and starts to cuddle you. She was always so nice, but you never knew why. Sure you had been with her the longest and were always with her, but she was always really close to you. Maybe she wanted to mate? Yeah, that seemed to be what her affection seemed to be pointing to. Suddenly something big comes out from a thin alley entrance a few feet away and lunges, and you quickly bat your host out of the way before you feel a sudden, sharp pain in your chest.

 

==> Dev: Be Pissed

You are now Dev, and you’re pissed. You had just found the transportalizer pad that led to Prospit, your plan was going to work out great, and you were going to get supplies when he suddenly you hear Redacted and turn to see him flying towards you. You quickly catch him and praise him for being such a smart bird, and are caught off guard and lose your balance when he starts hitting you with his wings. The next thing you know he’s on the ground with a knife through his chest, and you’re pissed. The mugger has no idea how to react as you fin-ished him in under thirty seconds with his own knife and dump him into a nearby sewer. You pick up your trusty bird, and only start bawling once you get back to your room. Eventually you realize you have a kernel sprite waiting to be used back in your house and you piece yourself back together before you wake up and start to usher your kernel sprite into your own small transportalizer and send it to your room on Derse.

 

==> Send more Plants

Once you put redacted in the kernel you go back to your computer and wait for him to come to. For now, you busy yourself with the most ridiculous thing possible.

Fill Wren’s house with plants while she’s napping, and then inform her of your doing so.

\-- haplessSharpshooter [HS] began pestering floralCatastrophe [FC--  
HS: So Wren  
HS: Have you checked inside your house  
HS: Specifically your bathroom  
FC: ✿ um  
FC: ✿ no?  
FC: ✿ why do i need to be worried about my bathroom?  
HS: Just a feeling  
FC: ✿ oh  
FC: ✿ well i'll go see  
FC: ✿ what am i looking for?  
HS: You'll know  
FC: ✿ oh my  
FC: ✿ dev was this really necessary?  
HS: Maybe  
HS: Maybe now  
HS: Who knows  
HS: Only me  
FC: ✿ care to enlighten me on the over use of geraniums?  
HS: Nah  
FC: ✿ darn  
HS: If you need them you have them now  
FC: ✿ thank you either way dev  
FC: ✿ so  
FC: ✿ you have your paint and stuff  
FC: ✿ what are you going to do?  
HS: Yeah  
HS: Well now that I have the sendifier  
HS: I can send myself to Prospit  
HS: I need to figure out how to get back before I go though  
HS: So I don't get stuck there  
FC: ✿ why do you even need to get to prospit???  
HS: [Classified]  
FC: ✿ dev!!!!!!  
FC: ✿ okay so  
FC: ✿ classified information and beautiful geraniums aside  
FC: ✿ what are we going to do now?  
FC: ✿ strife our way to our planets or what?  
HS: I guess that's the plan?  
FC: ✿ probably my plan  
FC: ✿ youre going to be doing your own thing arent you  
HS: Probably  
FC: ✿ no way i can convince you to tell me anything huh  
HS: Nope  
FC: ✿ please dev  
FC: ✿ if something happens  
FC: ✿ dev  
FC: ✿ what if we cant get in contact though?  
HS: I'll find a way  
HS: As always  
FC: ✿ :(  
FC: ✿ i wish i could feel safer about this but you do make it quite difficult  
HS: Just believe me when I say I know how to take care of myself  
HS: Like I have been for a long time  
FC: ✿ theres more than just you dev!  
FC: ✿ you cant go making our whole session a mess just because you wont speak to us first!  
HS: It won't be a mess  
HS: It'll be organized and quick  
FC: ✿ it'll be a disaster i bet  
HS: No, it won't  
FC: ✿ >:O  
FC: ✿ devastice!  
HS: Yeah  
FC: ✿ come on!  
FC: ✿ im your friend and i have been a very long time  
FC: ✿ this is just getting to be very ridiculous  
HS: Once everything happens you'll be glad I haven't told you anything  
HS: You won't know anything about me and can't be connected to anything I do  
FC: ✿ youre going to do something bad arent you  
HS: Not necessarily bad  
FC: ✿ not necessarily?  
FC: ✿ thats a huge gap left for it being very bloody bad!  
FC: ✿ ugh now you have me swearing  
FC: ✿ >:(  
HS: Again don't worry about it  
HS: I have it under control  
HS: And I have a little backup  
HS: Aka all the birds that are living in my house  
HS: Because I never close my windows  
FC: ✿ that has to be unsanitary  
HS: Nah I keep it clean  
FC: ✿ theyre wild!  
HS: Yeah but they're nice  
HS: I have like three of them sitting on my bed right now  
FC: ✿ um hello birds carry parasites???  
HS: They're just hanging out  
FC: ✿ thats kinda gross!  
HS: No it's not  
HS: And don't worry I've checked them  
HS: None of them have any parasites  
HS: I also give them baths  
HS: They're all very clean  
FC: ✿ sigh  
HS: ;fsdjk  
HS: I sneezed and hit the keyboard  
FC: ✿ how do you even sneeze?  
FC: ✿ your house has no plants  
HS: The windows are open  
FC: ✿ close them  
HS: Then the birds can't get in or out  
FC: ✿ and???  
HS: And it'll get crowded on both sides of the windows  
HS: One time Redacted clawed through a screen on one of the windows  
HS: And he let all the others in again  
HS: But it was summer so it was hot out  
FC: ✿ huh  
FC: ✿ totally normal  
HS: Well crows and ravens are really smart  
FC: ✿ im getting really sleepy from all this fighting  
HS: Maybe you should take a rest then  
FC: ✿ hmmm  
FC: ✿ so  
FC: ✿ dev  
FC: ✿ youre ok if i nap right?  
FC: ✿ im beginning to lag behind by now  
FC: ✿ all this strifing  
HS: Yeah, go ahead  
FC: ✿ will you behave?  
FC: ✿ no need for more geraniums?  
FC: ✿ no shenanigans on derse?  
HS: No more plants  
HS: Can't promise nothing on Derse though  
FC: ✿ sigh  
FC: ✿ things better be okay when i wake back up  
HS: They will be  
FC: ✿ okay then  
FC: ✿ bbl! <3  
HS: Have a good rest  
\-- floralCatastrophe [FC] ceased pestering haplessSharpshooter [HS] --

==> Be Redactesprite

You are now Redactesprite. The last thing you remember was getting stabbed through the chest with a knife. You now feel much smarter than before and are taking a few seconds to piece everything together. Your HOST’S actual name is MARY WRIGHT. She loves games like TF2, and anything related to mobs, as well as games of skill and accuracy. She’s an AS-SASSIN and is gone a lot of the time, but she’s still always made time for all her birds and hobbies. With your vast knowledge due to being a sprite you’re not entirely sure how. Speak-ing of Mary, she’s currently pestering someone while she’s waiting for you to come to. Before you do anything you see a deceased owl behind the bed. Poor thing must have gotten too roughed up during the deployment of machines.

==> Redactesprite: Eat the Owl

You attempt to eat the owl, but end up getting fused with it. Why did you think that would work? Either way, the only thing that seems different is that you feel a lot cuter and like you’re never going to end up sleeping again. Speaking of cute, you remember the affection Mary had been showing earlier. Speaking of Mary you notice she’s turned to see you, and seems to agree that you’re adorable.

You are now Crowlsprite.


End file.
